For this, an easy I will give another... errr... which often is seen in families. For example, to a child, the father is saying, "You're worthless!" Mother says, "You're unworthy!" Grandparents... They say, "You're unworthy!" At school, the teacher says, "You're unworthy!" "You're unworthy, you're unworthy!" Then what does the child begin to think? "I am unworthy!" In a typical Punjabi home, boys are given a bit more affection. They are pampered. Spoiled. "My boy, my boy!" "My boy..." No matter how bad his looks & sloppy his conduct, still they'll say, "He's a diamond!" How come? Hmm...? Absolutely floating like a skeleton, then also they'll say, "How strong is my son!" Means, mothers are totally blind in attachment. They can't see the reality, only their son! A daughter may have several qualities, she can't see those. The son may have none, then also she can spot it. Let me tell you an ironical thing. The irony is that in our... Errr...Between a girl and a boy, the way they discriminate, no? So, They'll tell the girl that learn to sew... Learn to cook. Learn to sew clothes. You should know how to talk properly. Decorate yourself appropriately. No? Like they'll say to a small kid, "Eat food!" He says, "I won't!" They say, "A dog will come and bite you!" "Eat!" So he eats due to the fear of the dog. So, like this, the girl is told, "If you don't know how to sew, then" "then no boy would marry you!" Boy and dog! Means... You're getting it! Learn how to cook. No one will marry... You should know how to do make up, else no one will marry... Sewing, embroidery, knitting-all these, you must know, else no boy will marry you. Like due to fear of the dog, the child eats bitter things, similarly, the poor girl learns everything. If a boy is born, all are happy. No one says, "Learn something!" If he fails, then they'll say, "Well! how will studies" "help?" The father runs a factory. There's a lot of ancestral money. No worries at all! There is no pressure of expectations. It is on the girls. Then, finally that girl gets married. Yes? Then, she meets her bridegroom. Now, she has learned sewing, embroidery... Education, cooking, adorning-sprucing, everything. The boy... So, she wonders, "Okay! This...! For him, I was pestered" "all my life!" [Audience laughs] Like that child who is shown the fear of the dog to make him eat lady's finger, bottle gourd, bitter gourd, apple gourd... "Eat, else the dog will bite. Eat," "else, the dog will bite." So, they say "girl, won't find a boy! Won't find a" "boy!" With this, what all is she made to do? But, as this child grows that some day he vents his anger on that dog. As he sees, "I'll rough you up!" "Because of you, [I] had to eat apple gourd!" "had to eat lady's fingers!" "had to eat bottle gourds, pumpkins!.." "Whoa, how" "much dread I had to face due to you!" Similarly, when the girl gets to meet the husband, she says, "Okay!" "Now, I'll teach you a lesson, now!" "Due to you, I didn't miss to " "learn anything. And what does he know?" Are you seeing the game of the mind? The girl is told, "You're weak, you're feeble!" "You need a support." You know You need a support. Either father, or brother, or son, or husband. Someone should be there. You should have money, beauty, brains, else you're nothing. You're naught! She accepts-I am naught. But, to the boy... "Diamond!" "Tiger sonny!" -Can't kill a fly! Then, also, he's a tiger sonny... -Can't go in the dark. Then, also a tiger sonny. -Hides behind his sister if someone confronts, then also they'll say "My" "tiger-sonny!" What kind of fake tiger is this? But, in that boy's mind, what thought is being planted, "You" "are strong!" So, what does he think?" "I am strong." Its the power of the mind. So, the bad thoughts, when are induced in the mind, the mind gets weaker. When great and good thoughts are induced in the mind the mind becomes strong. That is why it is important to listen to satsang. Because satsang gives you this wisdom which makes you really strong. Really shaktishali (powerful)! And then you can do anything. Then you become an unstoppable force. I'll give one example. Just lately, ehhh... one of my... errr... disciple's husband died. errr... She was... She is 28. Husband was 30. In an accident, he died. When she met me, after... you know... this demise of husband, I asked her, "How" "are you?" She said, "I am okay!" "I did cry when" "I got the news." "But, by the time, his dead" "body was brought back home" "from the hospital" "after the postmortem," "I kept on playing..." "this one bhajan," "of Vedanta," -"Iss kaya" "ka hove vinash hai" -The body is going to die. "tu toh sakshi swayam-" "prakash hai." -You're the illuminated conscious being. "Panch bhooton ka tann" "vistaara"- This body is extension created in the five elements. "Tu" "to drashta hai jaananhaara!" -You are the seer who is observing the game of the body. And she said, "I kept on" "just listening to that bhajan" "and kept on contemplating" "on this thought" "that nothing unusual has" "happened. The body is meant" "to die and it has died." "And the body" "is just an external frame." "And I am not" "the body, and I am the" "immortal being. I am the eternal." "So, for whom" "should I cry?" "And when the body was brought" "back," "I took care of all the" "ceremonies and cremation" "and everything." But I never shed a single "tear. Everybody in the family" "were thinking that maybe I am too" "ehhh.. broken" "inside. I am in a big" "shock, but actually" "I was too" "stilled inside." "Because this was a life lesson" "for me that I could see" "a dead body and I could see" "my own breathing and living" "body. And I could" "make the difference that" "which has died" "was never my husband." "The mind in this" "body was my husband" "but, in reality," "the mind has" "a... property" "and that property is of being" "always" "aloof..." Hence, when the death happens the mind doesn't stay in that body, the mind leaves the body right away. 28 years old girl, seeing her husband's dead body, does not cry. When the news came, she cried. It was a news, sudden happening. She wasn't prepared. But, till her husband's body was brought back in her mind, only this was going on, only this contemplation, this very thought of Vedanta -The body dies, I do not die! The self does not die. You are not related to the body. If it is with the body, then the body is still there. But, the conscious one that was present inside the body, the relation was with that. And that has left. And the nature of 'that' is that it belongs to no one at all. What is the nature of jeeva? -It does not belong to anyone. Due to ignorance, -This is my mother, father, brother, husband, son, we create these relations. But, the jeeva's... Jeeva means at the level of the mind, this self does not form a bond with anyone. Neither gets bound. That is why, once the jeeva leaves the body, the prana (life force) leaves, the jeeva is gone further into its journey ahead. It will be born somewhere else. According to the karma, again a new journey will begin. True knowledge, in this situation became such a great support for her. Such a great support that her family people felt that she should be taken to a psychologist, to a doctor. She has lost her mind! Why doesn't she weep? It was a very good marriage. The husband was very nice. But, when he was gone, he was just gone! Now, whose life can be trusted? With the Lord's grace, with true knowledge, through satsang, with the company of the Master, the discernment you attain; that discerning power gives you so much strength in life! And what is true knowledge? -In your mind, new and beautiful thoughts the reflection of truth, the reflection of eternal facts. Factual... Truth.. which is truth, which is eternal, with that true eternal reflection, when you live your life, then in life, remorse and attachment and sadness do not find any space. And the biggest happening is the death of some of your loved one. And at that time, was your mind still or not? Did the mind start crying, got sad or did the mind stay still? So, if the reflection of true knowledge stays, then the mind will be still. I am not saying he won't cry. This girl had also cried, because he was the companion, no? Now, he's gone. With whom, she played, ate, was weaving dreams of life- -All is finished now. But, in the mind, when this remembrance is ever present... When this thought always remains that I am True self. I am not this body. All the relations are of this body. If there is any bond that I have, its just with the Lord. So, in life, the biggest of the shocks are also absorbed just like that... So smoothly as butter slips! With absolute ease, he can face that situation. [Music] The body is not yours, not yours... [Music] The body is not yours, not yours... [Music] The body is not yours, not yours... [Music] Don't claim, "Mine, mine!" The body is not yours, not yours... The body... is not yours, not yours.... [Music] This life is of a couple of days... Like water-drop on a stone... This will get sacrificed... The body... is not yours, is not yours... The body... is not yours, is not yours... [Music] Oh, just as color dissolves in a wave... just as color dissolves in a wave... It just vanishes in flicker of the eye...
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